Female Logic

If you ain’t confused about something, then you’re living wrong.” – “The Accounting” by William Lashner

Now please folks, no angry emails. No threats from NOW. Just RELAX.

My wife is very bright, very thoughtful, funny, and possesses qualities that make her a wonderful human being. However, and this just adds to her charm, much of the time I have absolutely no idea what she is thinking or how.

Having said that………….I humbly suggest that a woman doesn’t think like a man. They just don’t. Drives me nuts at times.

Mostly I get a big kick out of the dynamics of the female thought process. When I take the time to consider the different interpretations of everyday life that women have, I shake my head and wonder…….in the words of the great Vince Lombardi……..”What the hell is going on here?”

You see, it is a fact that men think logically. Women……well……..not so much. I’m not sure how they think, but it certainly is not like a man.

My experience, 46 years of marriage, is that women have a tendency to complicate issues. I don’t think women are happy unless a question has at least a dozen answers they must ponder without reaching an eventual, logical, conclusion.

I’m not knocking it. Most of the time I love it. But man, there are times when I just have to wonder what is going on in that female brain. While I may wonder, she does not.

She seems to always know exactly what I am thinking and why. From my perspective, that is disturbing.

The struggle continues and one has to love the repartee. I do.

Here’s an example.

Him: You made good time.

Her: I hauled ass.

Him: What?

Her: I didn’t waste time.

Him: Well did you get everything?

Her: I couldn’t get the diet coke. There was no one there to help me.

Him: Diet Coke?

Her: Ya. Remember? You called as I was leaving the store. Said we needed Diet Coke.

Him: I didn’t say that. I said we need milk.

Her: Exactly.

Him: Huh? Did I miss something? Who are you?

“If your beliefs don’t fit the facts, then just pound the hell out of the facts until they do.” – From “The Society” by Michael Palmer

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2 Responses to Female Logic

  1. I can’t believe I missed this one! One of my favorite topics…..the different wiring of the male and female species. It is a great cosmic joke, designed for chaos.

    Woman: “How do you write women so well?” Melvin: “I think of a man, and I take away reason and accountability.” ~Jack Nicholson as Melvin Udall in “As Good As It Gets.”

    Like

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