“It’s never happened in the World Series competition, and it still hasn’t.” Yogi Berra
Wrong line rule. Requires a large, busy, retail outlet with long lines at all cash registers.
You began today’s Wal Mart shopping experience when you arrived almost 2 hours ago and had to park 40 miles from the entrance. (Those parking lots are huge) With a temp of 105 you know this is not going to be a good day.
The hike to the entrance alone is fraught with danger. All kinds of idiots out there. But I digress.
Man..my lucky day. No flat tires on the cart. Should have bought a lottery ticket. Just need a few things and I’m out of here.
God, that woman is disgusting. What a pig. Check out the tats. She looks like a street map of Atlanta, GA. And she has 4 kids. Eeeeew. Wonder if she votes.
OK. Just about finished. Just 2 more things in frozen foods. Whoa…….is that an employee? I know that guy. Wasn’t he in “Deliverance”? Hello……………I just found the missing link.
Heading for the check out. Wow….look at those lines. Might as well get in this line. Just 2 in front of me. Hmmm…..that line over there is moving faster. Why is this line so slow? That woman must be feeding the 8th Air Force. C’mon….C’Mon. Haven’t got all day here folks.
Hey….where’s the cashier going? A price check!!!! Gimme a break!!! Did that Neanderthal in front of me just give me a strange look?
That other line seems to be moving. Time to make a move. I’ll get in that one. Hmmmm….the Neanderthal just gave me that “smirk” look. Screw her.
What’s this? Now that other line is moving and this one isn’t!!!@$% Look at that smug Neanderthal. She’s getting checked out. Did she just give me the finger?
Hey……….Knock off the BS up there. You get paid to check people out………not to discuss the latest rumor. Man….look at that. The lady who was behind me in the other line is now checking out. Why me Lord?
I’ve got to calm down……get a grip.
Finally………………….. I’m out of here.
Now……where did I park the car?
“The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.” Lucille Ball